December 2010
9 tags
Searching for answers.
Things just keep getting more difficult.
I don’t know what’s going on with me. I’m not sure why I’m having such a hard time, or how this goes from good to bad to worse and back again.
I can’t help but wonder if I ever began to get better in the first place. I was really struggling over the summer, especially in August into September. Maybe I should have gone into a...
Body, forgive me for the damage I've caused.
So, I would just like to write this down so that a few days from now, I can’t just say that I never said it.
Now that the holidays are over, I am going to start eating healthily again.
No more overeating, no more restricting to compensate for the overeating. I am going to eat like a normal person.
I hope that I can get myself out of this funk, because I sure as hell don’t feel in...
Merry Christmas to all of my lovely followers! :)
No place like anywhere but home for the holidays.
So, my Aunt tonight…
We’ve always had problems. Only when I was little did we actually get along, but since then, there’s always been a tension between us. It even went so far as not speaking for a few months with her and that side of the family because we got in some stupid argument that, of course, everyone took her side during. No one was right or wrong, we both made...
13 tags
Stay strong.
Sometimes it’s hard to find the motivation to get up out of bed every morning. It’s okay to let yourself stay in bed for a day. But don’t let it turn to habit. Stay strong. It’s okay to let yourself have a day of weakness, as long as you force yourself to get back up. We wouldn’t know what strength is without weakness…but to give completely in to weakness is to...
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Time heals those wounds, but you're left with...
I guess I should have been paying attention in my Lit class, but I wrote a poem/song and this is my favorite line of what I wrote. When it’s finished I’ll post it here.
Stay strong <3
“You don’t understand just how beautiful you are.”
– Too Beautiful by He Is We
I hate to bitch about all of this…but I have to.
I’m always sick. I’m always tired. I’m slacking. I’m falling behind in school work. I’m too tired and sick to care. I’m too stressed out to realize that these college applications are important, but that I need to pass my classes to graduate high school. I’m too stressed to realize that none of it...
11 tags
Stop the hate. Spread the love.
Okay, so I have been seeing too much anti-skinny, anti-fat, anti-everything!
We have all had those times where we can’t help but think “skinny bitches.” Or a time when we can’t help but think “I can’t ever let myself be that fat.” But people, those thoughts need to stop.
I’m as sick of seeing that thin people are “ugly twigs” as I am of...
Remember that every day has the potential to be an...
Fed up.
I feel like an inadequate girlfriend, daughter, friend, student and worker. He loves me to death and I feel like I’m too selfish. My Mom never seems to be happy with anything I do…ever; it’s never enough. My friends are always there for me and yet I somehow seem to stay wrapped in my own mind, depressed. I’ve been slacking on school work. All the stress and depression is...
“My Declaration of Self-Esteem
by Virginia Satir
I AM ME
In all the world,...”
– I found this in a classroom and wrote down the author; it was somehow inspiring to me.
7 tags
One slip up doesn't mean recovery must crumble.
I cut tonight. For the first time in over a month.
It was one time, one moment of weakness.
It won’t happen again because tomorrow is a new day.
One day of weakness doesn’t equal a complete loss of strength.
Stay strong and have faith.
Put life in perspective. →
post tenebras lux: so here we are, still looking... →
thesunalsosets:
so here we are, still looking for answers. measurements, formulas, angles, numbers, conciseness. test a hypothesis enough and we’ve got a theory. we’ve got chemical reactions that we’ve never experiences before. it’s like everyone is searching for an algorithm of life; let’s get proactive. we…
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missbee229-deactivated20101217 asked: Hey, I'd like to say that you're truly an inspiration and I think you're gonna help a lot of people one day. You've helped me already, thank you. Stay strong x x
“Fear is only a verb if you allow it to be.”
10 tags
Fun House Mirrors
Usually the words “fun house mirror” are used negatively, saying that the person doesn’t see themselves as how they are; someone with anorexia sees him or herself through a fun house mirror that stretches them wider, makes them look short or fat or ugly. The kind of fun house mirror I’m talking about, though, does the exact opposite.
I’m walking through Target with...
Fact: I find myself utterly beautiful and I am...
libbydougherty:
I don’t know why, but I just get happier and more confident everyday. I think it is because I am realizing that there is no way in hell that people wont love me because my body isn’t perfect.
Love yourself.
Just do it.
This is where I strive to be, and I AM proud of you…for coming to the conclusion that you are beautiful. I admire your inner strength and confidence...
13 tags
I don't care if I'm not good enough for you,...
Daddy,
Have you had a good life a thousand miles away? How are your kids, are they happy to have a father that left his first daughter? Do they know they have a half sister who went half insane trying to figure out the other half of her identity because that one specific entity was missing: you.
I was never sure of your heritage, your eye color, your age, your height, the spelling of your last...
Day 10: One person you can trust.
This is difficult. While I don’t trust many people, there are a three that I trust wholeheartedly. Jennifer and Laura, my best friends. Tom, my boyfriend.
Laura: The girl I can tell anything, the one that accepts my faults and my flaws and somehow turns them into something beautiful. The girl that is my best friend, that has gotten me through everything, that has always reminded me to have...
11 tags
I need some words of encouragement.
I need a bit of help, I need help finding my faith…faith in this world, faith in recovery, faith in myself.
I need words of encouragement, of hope…anything at all.
I hate to be the one that’s weak, but tonight is a bad night. & sometimes to find strength, you have to allow yourself to be a little bit weak….just a little bit.
Words of encouragement and hope and faith...
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Day 09: Two things you wish you could do.
One: Recover. This eating disorder has stolen so many years of my life. Imagine I added the minutes and hours and days I spent thinking about food, finding ways to get around eating it, shoving it into my face, binging…It’s sad to think that all of those minutes would probably add to months and months wasted on this disorder. I want to live.
Two: Adopt every dog that I see in an...